Redux

Well it’s been a busy few weeks. Not much has been overtly kinky in my life. There has been a lot of service submission happening though. I am certainly getting into being served. It’s a little odd to have someone cooking and cleaning for me this consistently… while I do very little. It’s even odder since I have, historically, really disliked cooking and cleaning and have not hesitated to let other people in my life do it as much as they would. I think the main difference is that this is specifically me being served. He’s doing it not so much because someone has to, as because it is something I have asked for or he is volunteering as a service to me.  And, of course, the other main difference is that I’m not helping or doing something else “useful” as an exchange. I’m sitting around with my dog, playing video games, watching tv, chatting online, etc. It has been going on for several weeks now. And I am about ready to check in with my husband to see how it feels to him. I am hoping he is feeling good about it. But I’m also prepared for him not to be ok with it at all… even though it’s really been him volunteering things more often than not. We’ve been down the service vs. no service road before. It should be an interesting conversation to say the least.

In other corners of my kink life, things with #2 have simmered down a lot. We have been doing our own thing for the most part for the last several days. And communication has been a bit more spotty for the last month or so. The holidays are busy, and the distance between us doesn’t help any. I also find that the more my needs are met by my husband, the less I feel a need for another submissive. I do still find his personality and appearance compelling. But I don’t feel a burning need for furthering his submission right now. It would be fantastic if we can continue to develop things. And I’m still excited to see where we might go. But now I think our excitement is also tempered with frustration and disappointments we have experienced along the way. It’s reality as opposed to fantasy. This is the point I always seem to hit about now where things have gotten real. And in the next few months, things will either blossom or die if history is any indication. Either way, I don’t think I will have any regrets. But I’m still hopeful things will blossom.

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