I have so much to write about. It’s hard to focus on just one thing. So I won’t!
I was on vacation last week. It was ok, but not enough actual relaxing. In order to facilitate being with my husband and family, I did a lot of running around. And a lot of being a tourist. I want to take a vacation without the rest of the family. Then I can be pretty sure there will be much more relaxing going on. And I want to go somewhere outside my home state. It’s been too long since I went somewhere that was a plane ride away instead of a car ride. Of course, in order to make that happen, I need a dog-sitter who can come stay at the house. I have my eye on a nice young man. He could stand to get out of his own house. So perhaps it might actually work!
On vacation, there was no sex. None. Zero. Not what I was expecting. I wasn’t expecting us to swim on the beach in latex catsuits then have wild bondage sex with him hanging from the rafters. But I was really hoping for … something. There was barely even any hand holding or pets. It didn’t do a lot to increase my intimacy with the husband. When we got home, similar lack of sex. This is a problem.
But anonymous, you say, you’re the dominant so just take it if you want it! But it doesn’t really work that way for us. First, I really can’t get into pity sex or duty sex. If he’s just doing it because he has to, it’s a massive turn-OFF for me. And more often than not over the last year, he is not in the mood. During a scene, I can be pretty sure that he will be in the mood. It’s not 100%, but it’s probably about a 90% sure thing. When we’re not in an actual scene, reverse those numbers. I do understand that we’re not much for vanilla sex. It isn’t my choice either. But I’m perfectly happy (and turned on) by giving a spanking as foreplay or just telling him to hold still while I sit on his face and tease him as a prelude to penis in vagina. That doesn’t seem to work for him. And he’s not really helping much in figuring out what does work.
Touch is my primary love language. For me, that means sex is included. That is touch. I need it in order to feel loved. I also tend to be very physically affectionate. Shocking for someone with touch as the primary love language, right? My husband doesn’t seem to like it very much. In addition to not being in the mood for sex often, he also doesn’t seem to appreciate when I come up behind him for a squeeze and a nibble. At least he loves pets and rubs, otherwise it wouldn’t work at all. But I am craving cock. I really am.
I do have a theory about us. I think that touch doesn’t figure into his love languages very highly. In addition to that, I think that because it’s so high for me and (presumably) so low for him… and our schedules mean I don’t see him very often… I end up way overstepping his ability to receive touch because I’m basically attempting to make up for lost time. So I’m all over him trying to get my need for touch met when I haven’t seen him in 2 weeks. And he’s feeling smothered and wants me to get off of him. In addition to that, he may be interpreting my rubs, pets, nibbles, squeezes, nuzzles, and grabs as an attempt to seduce him. In all fairness, he’s sometimes right about that. Sometimes his skin feels so good under my hands that I just want to attack him, throw him down, and have my way with him!
Too bad not just any old cock will do. That could probably be arranged almost any time if I weren’t so particular. But there are only two cocks I’m interested in. One is hundreds of miles away. The one here doesn’t seem to be interested very often.