More ruminations

I have been doing crunches and also exercises for my back muscles. I have had some back issues. Most of the time for years and years… they were an occasional minor annoyance. In the past few years, they have gotten worse. It got to the point that I was constantly uncomfortable and sometimes in a fair amount of pain. It was affecting how I could play and how I could work. Sometimes I couldn’t work it was so bad. A few months ago, I decided I really needed to do something about it since it was negatively affecting my life. So I did.

The great news is that over the past few weeks, I have reduced the back pain. Now it’s back to being an occasional annoyance instead of ever-present. I think that as long as I keep doing the core exercises, I can get it to go away unless I do something incredibly stupid. I’m very happy with the results in my core strength. But…

An anticipated side effect is that I’ve grown about 3″ in my waist. I knew it was coming. I know my body pretty well at this point. And while I’m thrilled I can work and play the way I want to, I’m less thrilled that my clothes don’t fit right and my body is behaving in new ways. It’s most obvious to me when I’m sitting or bending. I have extra mass. Common wisdom is that an inch in the middle means you have gained/lost approximately 10 lbs. Now I know i haven’t gained 30 lbs in two months. But my midsection is 3″ bigger. I don’t tend to lose body fat, I just gain muscle. So basically, I feel even more like a hippo than I did a few months ago.

I’m trying to remind myself that the main point is that I accomplished my goal of getting rid of my back pain. But it’s still hard to get bigger and older in a world where youth and being thin are the thing all women are trained from birth to want and to gain their personal value from. I need to plaster it on the walls so I don’t freak out too much more: NO MORE BACK PAIN! YOU DID IT!

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