I know you’ll never read this because (in addition to the fact that this is an anonymous blog) you refuse to acknowledge me. I know I’m not what you want for your son. I know that you don’t like me. I think I scare you for some reason. I know that you wish I would just go away.
And here’s the thing… one day I will be gone from his life. But it won’t be me that leaves. It will be him. Some day. He will go.
I know that you probably think I’m taking advantage of your innocent son. I’m not. He’s a wonderful man. A man. A young man, but definitely a man. He has a tremendous capacity for thinking in general and critical thought in particular. I’m sure you played some role in creating that in him since you were largely a single parent, and I must thank you for it. He’s a deep thinker and he is very good at introspection. I’m not taking advantage of an innocent moron. Your son is gentle and kind. But he’s no naive innocent. And he’s certainly not stupid. He’s actually incredibly smart. You gave him the genetics then made sure he had a great education. If you don’t trust me, trust that. Trust him. Trust that you have raised a good, intelligent, thinking, individual. Because you have. You did a good job being a mom. He’s a wonderful human being.
But also know that both he and I know this won’t last. There are some very primal needs that he has which I can’t meet. Yes, there are many of his needs that I can meet. And I do my best to meet them because I love your son. I want him to be happy and fulfilled. I’m happiest when those I care about are happy. That’s my nature. But I also know that there are some things I simply can’t ever give him. So one day he will move on. And I will mourn the loss of a lover and a loved one. He will take a piece of my heart with him when he goes. I knew that when I decided to engage with him. He knew it too. We still deemed it worth the time we could have together to love and grow and explore. But make no mistake, it will end. And you will have your wish.
But for now, I have to thank you for being such a huge part of creating such a tremendously wonderful man. He’s incredible. He really is. And for all that I’m twice his age, he has already taught me so much in the year I’ve known him. You have helped to create a fantastic human. And I am sure his future wife will feel as lucky as I do to have him in her life. Thank you.